My last job was a nightmare. I was doing what I loved to do, but it was toxic. During deadline, work stretched to 12- or even 15-hour days. I listened to complaints all day long from my older coworkers about what I was “making them” do—even though they continue to do the very same things now that I’m gone. My phone started ringing by 7 am every morning, sometimes earlier.

There was no peace.

I shrugged this off. I told my amazing life coach that it was just my pattern (“it’s a journalism thing”). For my entire career, I’ve worked an all-in job (New York magazine during 9/11, the celeb beat during its heyday, being editor-in-chief of Vegas magazine—the city that never sleeps) until burn-out. Then I would “heal” (rest, chill out) for a few months or longer until I felt like going back in. Hence my moves to Austin, Costa Rica, NorCal wine country…It was a rhythm that seemed to work for me.

Until Stef asked, “Why don’t you next create a work life that doesn’t lead to burn-out?”

So simple.

**Scroll to the bottom to see what this exercise has already manifested.**

What I typed into ChatGPT re: my dream work-life balance:

“Write me a few paragraphs that tell me what a dream day would look like if I'm able to travel because I have control over my schedule. I'm disciplined enough to balance a few jobs—one that puts me in a freelance setting where I work when I want covering news for a national audience. I also have a local job that lets me be part of the community. It keeps me busy but I'm able to stay organized so I have plenty of me time. And finally, I have additional work that helps pay the bills. I trust all of my coworkers. I wake up after a good night's sleep every morning because I'm not panicked about turning on my phone to see what fire I need to put out or fight I need to handle. People come to my events because they're fun and have an amazing vibe. Who doesn't love to get dressed up? And people read what I put out there because I write in a sophisticated manner, not corny. On social media, people vibe with my middle-aged life changes and fearlessness. When I leave town, I trust that the various teams of people I work with are handling things; there is never panic about turning my phone on when my plane lands. And when I'm the one covering home base? They trust me.”

What Chat GPT dreamed up for me in a matter of seconds (edited down a bit so you’re not here all day):

“I wake up refreshed because, for once, I’m not bracing myself for chaos. My freelance work is fulfilling and organized, and I’ve created a rhythm to my life that keeps everything in balance. After a stretch and a quick breakfast, I glance over my day’s schedule. There’s a national news piece to file in the morning—but the deadline feels manageable. I grab my laptop, settle onto the sunlit couch, and lose myself in the work, knowing my editors trust my instincts and my voice.

By midday, I shift gears and dive into my local job. I feel so connected to this town, so rooted in its people and rhythms. When I walk into the café to meet someone, I inevitably run into a familiar face or two.

Later, I make time for myself—a long walk, a yoga class, or just an hour thumbing through a new book. Despite juggling multiple jobs, I’ve mastered the art of carving out time to breathe and dream.”

The Result

I did this exercise just a few short weeks ago. My plan was to continue with my life coach, travel—and start looking for work opportunities in mid-January, when I will find myself alone in Costa Rica, my happy place.

Instead, this is what has happened:

• I started writing online entertainment stories for the revered national magazine Newsweek. It is a flexible, remote job with a reasonable schedule—the earliest I can start working is 9 am.

• I’ve agreed to work a local job starting in the spring. It includes throwing small events and other activities that will keep me very involved in my community.

• I’m having a blast on TikTok, where my “mid-life” niche has attracted more than 2,000 followers in a few months. I love connecting with people.

And it’s only the end of December! Visualizing, dreaming, wanting something different and putting it all out there…It works.

Well…I’m off to a “café to meet someone”—let’s see if I run into “a familiar face or two”!

Remember…If you want to change your life, you have to actually change your life.